As an update for my SAM’s out there, here are a few pointers for having boundaries at home and with your family so that you can keep your peace of mind and be present for your spouse or significant other, your kids, and most importantly yourself!
You may have to get up early, but it’s worth it to have some “me time” before you start your day.
I was a single mom for a long time, and I can’t express how much better your day goes when you take the time to listen to some peaceful massage type music in the morning or do a form of mediation. It clears your head and makes the rest of the day somehow much easier.
Even if you are not a morning person, just try getting up 30 minutes earlier or even listening to some soft music with your headphones in bed before you get up and trust me, it will become easy and even exciting to wake up early and have that time.
I’ll admit that compartmentalizing your day is a bit harder with young children than with older ones, and it’s certainly harder than segmenting your day at the office as a business owner, however, the most successful SAH Mom’s that I have dealt with treat their home like an office and run it like one too.
Even though things may come up, it is imperative that you have a schedule and do your best to stick to it. That’s where the boundaries come in – by saying no sometimes, and stating that you can do it at another time. You don’t have to explain your schedule to everyone.
Just simply state “I can’t do that right now, but I can do it tomorrow at three. Does that work”. Don’t be afraid to do this! It will keep you sane, I promise.
In the evening when your significant other comes home, it’s OK for you to want a break of some kind.
Keep in mind that your partner probably needs to wind down as well so figure out a compromise that allows you both to “shift” in the evening so that you can both be present for each other. If you are a single parent then this is much harder, but I know from past experience that SAH Mom’s can help each other out by giving each other a break when it comes to younger kids that need constant monitoring.
Back to “me time”.
This applies to both your significant other and your girlfriends. Make a point to have date nights and girl time, even if it’s just dinner or a short happy hour. You need to think of you! Remember what they say on the airplane.
Take care of yourself so you can take care of your child if the air pressure goes down. That’s because they know that if you don’t take care of yourself, then you can’t take care of everything else.
Have a great week!